Today's "Ask Molly" letter was written by a basset hound from Roswell, New Mexico, Grumps O'Flannagan. Grumps writes:
Dear Molly,
What is it with cats? We have a WHOLE LOT of cats in our town, and they get away with everything. Why is that? In our house the cat, Spiderman, is allowed to jump up on the counter and eats anything he feels like, and he sneaks human food off of the table when no one is looking. I have to wait politely until my human fills my dog dish with kibble. (My human is very stingy with the kibble - just because I have a slightly rounded belly. Besides, I would really prefer steak.) But here's my question. Cats have no discipline. They act as if they own the house. They get to pee and poop inside the house in a special litter box. (Most of the time it's inside the litter box.) while I have to go outside, even when it's a hundred degrees in the shade. And they just have this attitude. I would like to smack Spiderman and chase him up a cactus, but I'd get into trouble.
Sincerely,
Grumps the basset.
Dear Grumps,
There's a reason why there are so many cats in Roswell. They are aliens from outer space. And they exercise mind control over the humans. They don't take orders; they give orders. Humans think cats are cute and cuddly, but watch out. They will take over one day. Mark my words. And if you ever take a bite out of a cat, you will turn into an alien yourself.
Regards,
Molly
(With thanks to Microsoft clipart for the drawing of Grumps.)
Dear Molly,
What is it with cats? We have a WHOLE LOT of cats in our town, and they get away with everything. Why is that? In our house the cat, Spiderman, is allowed to jump up on the counter and eats anything he feels like, and he sneaks human food off of the table when no one is looking. I have to wait politely until my human fills my dog dish with kibble. (My human is very stingy with the kibble - just because I have a slightly rounded belly. Besides, I would really prefer steak.) But here's my question. Cats have no discipline. They act as if they own the house. They get to pee and poop inside the house in a special litter box. (Most of the time it's inside the litter box.) while I have to go outside, even when it's a hundred degrees in the shade. And they just have this attitude. I would like to smack Spiderman and chase him up a cactus, but I'd get into trouble.
Sincerely,
Grumps the basset.
Dear Grumps,
There's a reason why there are so many cats in Roswell. They are aliens from outer space. And they exercise mind control over the humans. They don't take orders; they give orders. Humans think cats are cute and cuddly, but watch out. They will take over one day. Mark my words. And if you ever take a bite out of a cat, you will turn into an alien yourself.
Regards,
Molly
(With thanks to Microsoft clipart for the drawing of Grumps.)
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